It has been a long time since I have written a blog post due to insomnia. As I am fond of saying, since I met Daniel, my bouts of sleeplessness have been less and less. Even though we did not sleep together until we were married, somehow just knowing him made me more comfortable and I slept well more and more. But for some reason, the last few nights my sleeplessness has returned, and I find myself tossing and turning, and no matter how heavy my head is, I cannot sleep, or I will be just drifting off, and I will suddenly become aware I am drifting off and jolt awake again. And, as always, by the time I start seriously considering taking sleeping medicine, it is so late that I know it will affect my ability to get up for work or whatever other obligation I have going on. So, tonight, after two hours of tossing and turning, and being unable to fall asleep, despite turning on a fan, trying every sleeping position possible, drinking water, praying for everyone I can think of, laying and staring at the ceiling, I have finally decided to just get up and write a blog post about how frustrating it is to not be able to go to sleep when you are exhausted.
In keeping with what I just said, did you know it is incredibly frustrating not to be able to go to sleep, when your eyes keep wanting to close, your head aches with sleepiness, and you want nothing more than to crawl into your soft, warm bed, and sink into a deep, restful sleep? So, now I have read the Bible, written in my journal, jotted out a blog post – so the question remains, at what point should I try again? I keep staring at the clock – 1:27 AM – and thinking about how I need to be up for work in the morning and how I am going to be falling asleep during the day, which is incredibly embarrassing on a new job! Or any job, for that matter.
Maybe I should use this opportunity to write for a bit – but I feel too frustrated. Maybe I should read? but then I will get all involved in my book and not want to put it down and it will be 3:00 AM before I try again. I knew I should keep some MidNite on hand. I should remember to buy some next time we are at the store.
Well, at any rate – I will stop bothering all you poor people who are probably actually able to sleep – and get some water, and sit here and think about when to try to go back to sleep.